Relax, It’s Not Terrorism

January 9, 2007 § 7 Comments

Yesterday morning the smell of what they say was natural gas blanketed the streets of New York City.  It covered most of midtown and into Jersey.  One guy said it smelled like a mixture of kerosine and oil, perhaps diesel fuel or even heating oil?  Who the fuck knows, because nobody has explained it to anyone yet.  The mayor suggests it might just be the stink additive they put in natural gas to make it stink since natural gas by itself is odorless.  But he was grasping at straws trying to avoid panic.  The end of the day came with no answers but one.  It was not a terror attack.  We have no fucking clue what it might have been or what could have possibly caused it or even what the substance was, but we can tell you this for sure:  It was not a terror attack on the city.

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On October 28, 2005 a similar event took place only it was the smell of maple syrup instead of natural diesel fuel heating oil gas additive.  There was no explanation whatsoever except one:  It WAS NOT a terror attack on the city of New York.  We have absolutely no idea what the hell could possibly make the entire city of New York smell like maple syrup, but we know this for sure and you can take this to the bank:  It WAS NOT a terror attack.  Just go out and enjoy a city smelling of breakfast at the diner.  It was pleasant.  It was unexplained.  It was NOT a terror attack.

I’m so glad our government and media reporting agencies are so honest with us or else I’d be suspicious…

§ 7 Responses to Relax, It’s Not Terrorism

  • jenafear says:

    Vermont is close by, my guess is that mystery scent of maple syrup was a very harmless “maple syrup meltdown”. Next thing you know it will be a patchoulli attack I mean, mystery potent smell wafting from over there.

    Isn’t it grand how the media will scrutinize Paris Hilton’s wonky eye to the death but not uncover what they really know of this smell situation.

  • intolerant says:

    What is disturbing about the maple syrup thing is that there are any number of potential sources, none of which besides a true maple syrup factory explosion is very comforting. Airborne chemicals such as the shit in antifreeze (which any hellbent revenge nerd would know) is extremely toxic and a possible culprit, yet we were all told we had nothing to worry about. Mayor Bloomberg told the city that stench yesterday was harmless, even though 19 people ended up in the hospital while the rest of the city didn’t believe him and avoided breathing it. It’s harmless, but we don’t know what it is or where it is coming from. And all is well anyway…it dissipated by mid afternoon so the problem, what ever it was (not terrorism) is solved. Go back to breathing and next time we’ll be sure to make it odorless when we gas you.

    And tell me about Paris Hilton’s eye! I didn’t hear about it!! OH my God is she alright?

  • jenafear says:

    Paris hilton’s wonky eye – I will post a picture of it, don’t be alarmed, I think it’s just her brain doesn’t allow both eyes to open fully, it has limited abilities.

  • Hammer says:

    Bloomberg is a fuck nozzle. there are plenty of devices that can analyze the air for known chemicals. I smell a rat.

  • intolerant says:

    A rat perhaps, but since the smell has apparently gone away, it never was. People forget the next day. Five years from now when the medical problems manifest themselves in these people in who knows how many different forms, who will remember the maple syrup or fuel oil stink bombs over New York lasting less than a day? Well…I will, but what normal person will?

  • intolerant says:

    My sister who lives and works in that hellhole seems to think yesterday’s stink bomb was a dry run for the delivery system planned for use in a gassing. Makes the most sense to me. Use something with an unmistakable odor to gage how far and wide it will spread. Financial districts; the middle of the City. We worry about what we can smell, we should be worried when we can’t smell it…just start dropping like flies for no apparent reason. The next question is this: Is it terrorists or our own people preparing to perform some sort of chemical test on us?

    I wonder about the similarities of the areas covered between the last Maple Syrup incident in October 05 and the one yesterday in New York. I’ll have to do a little research and see if I can find out anything. Perhaps the Maple Syrup didn’t spread far and wide enough and failed the initial test. I think back then it floated out onto Long Island. This time it headed to Jersey.

  • myhouse says:

    There’s a lot of Jews in NY, so perhaps it was Zyklon B (aka Cyclon B). Someone was just trying to kill some vermin.

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